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Loneliness has been found to be linked to mental decline – therefore I am glad that I am able to be social. I continue to PLAY a mean social game but I have to admit that I really miss our community pool. I did my best socializing in that water, floating on a noodle. Wintertime seems to be more for hibernation – I need to fix that. Add that to my list.
I also try (word is TRY) daily to cut my losses, things I can and can not do and carry on the best I can. Some days are harder than others, as most days are for all of us. My attitude is that I hate to cut anything and I continue the best I can. No matter how far you are down – there is a way up.
My ways up are not very graceful as most of my losses this year involve my “healed” leg. Healed to the Dr. and a daily pain for me that flows over to Tom. Physical pain on top of the Alzheimer’s can some days be too much to bear. I won’t describe the outcome but think of a toddler throwing a BIG tantrum. Get the picture?
I have had a wonderful and busy October. I’ve been so lucky to enjoy dinners out with neighbors and friends – think ALL YOU CAN EAT Sushi! UGH for some and divine for me and Tom.
When I talk about a dinner out with neighbors that included a big slab of beef do not talk to me about my diet.
A very special meal was at a friend’s house with take out Chinese and 3 hours of wonderful and funny conversation.
Quote, just for ME:
“For most of my life I was (and still am, I admit) a “busy person.” I pretty much came out of the womb with a list of things on my to-do-list, and as I got older that to-do list became longer… and longer… and longer….” How long I can make a list is not for me to decide but I am praying….for a long time. It’s the making of the list, not completing it now that makes me content.” Just ask Tom. He works so hard to help me complete my lists.
I worry about my restlessness and wonder if this is what it is going to be like for the rest of my life. I have this need to fill my days with something—anything—so I wouldn’t have to face absolutely nothing.
A wise person once said, “Don’t just do something, sit there.” So take some time out of your busy schedule each day to just BE.
No computer, no phone, no Internet, no TV, no music, no reading, no talking. There are just you and your own crazy thoughts. You might be surprised at what you find lurking in the deepest corners of your mind. Peace, joy, forgiveness, clarity? There’s only one way to find out.
Meditation makes you realize it’s not so much the silence as it is the not being around people that’s so profound. No human interaction, a human break if you will, is its own simple kind of joy.
Find a quiet time and place (come to my house)
- Sit comfortably
- Focus on your breathing
- When your mind wonders bring it back _ ha, too funny for some of us
- Start at about 10 minutes working to 20 minutes.
So Sharron how are you doing?
My emotions are all over the place and I can snap in a second.
I get angry at myself for not being able to remember something.
I get angry at Tom for not being able to figure out what I want.
I get upset with new procedures such as figuring out a new phone or computer.
So far I can keep myself under control in public. If I feel uncomfortable, ready to have a meltdown or are in a too crowded area I tell Tom and we leave.
This is the disease. I am not always in control.
I want you to know how I feel
Let me be independent. Let me do as much as possible
Love me as you always did.
Speak directly to me.
Talk to me or read to me. I do not want to lose the ability to talk.
Loving touches are so important.
Continue to let me, or help me do hobbies or activities I enjoy.
I want a say on who helps out – I chose who I do and do not want around when I start progressing.
I want reliable help that I like.
Let me take care of myself while I can – see friends, go out to lunch or dinner.
Keep me engage with family and friends – even if I do not know their names. Have friends and family visit.
Make me feel safe – where I live now.
Celebrate the small things I can do.
Do not treat me like a burden.
Talk about how I want the end to be. Tom and I have talked about staying home as opposed to a facility, what measures I want at the end, who I want with me.
One thing to remember is that I am still a person. When I can no longer remember names of family and friends and you talk in front of and around me like I am not there you do not know what is going on in my brain. I may well understand what you say.
Be respectful Preserve my dignity Treat me as an adult
Speaking all of the above Tom and I made Banana Bread and Muffins today along with a big pot of chicken soup. He is so kind and patient and helps me do the things that I enjoy.
I look forward to a couple of vacations this month. A cabin on the Shenandoah River and a trip to the Caribbean.
I’d like to thank Brookdale for including me in their Kick-Off activities and Williamsburg Landing for giving Tom & I the wonderful opportunity of speaking to their Alzheimer’s Support group, staff and residents.
Talking keeps me going.
I thank the Alzheimer’s Association for again asking me to talk at the Williamsburg Walk Opening Ceremony. My pleasure as always.
I also want to thank my WALK team for making October 24th so awesome for me. Most of the team are my neighbors at the Villas at Five Forks. Thanks also to a super woman from my church for pitching right in and 3 people from my support group. All of you have a special place in my heart.